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CURRICULUM VITAE
Name as it appears on your birth certificate?
Jonathan David Archer
Current name? See above
Nicknames? Jon, Jonny, Jack, JD, Cap'n (only Trip
could make my rank into a nickname!)
Parents' names? Henry and Sally Archer
Siblings? None. Well, Trip is like a brother to
me.
Number of candles that appeared on your last birthday
cake? 43 (I'm getting old...)
Date that you regularly blow them out? April 1 (no
jokes, please)
Pets? Porthos! My buddy my pal. I've had dogs all
my life.
Height? 2m
Eye color? Green
Hair color? Brown
Piercings? I had my ear pierced on a dare, but it's
closed up now.
Tattoos? None
How much do you love your job? Lots and lots. We're
making history with every light-year. Yes, Trip, I know I
say it all the time, but it's true! :o)
Birthplace? Ithaca, NY
Hometown? San Francisco, CA
Current residence? Enterprise. My ship!
College attended, degree? University of Pennsylvania
(Bachelor's of Science), Air Force Academy
What kind of car do you drive? I have a Duster moldering
in my aunt's backyard, but I don't think it still runs.
PREFERENCES
Croutons or bacon bits? Bacon bits (but they have
to be fake)
Coke or Pepsi? Coke
Sprite or 7UP? neither.
Coffee or ice cream? Ice cream. Chocolate ice cream.
Chocolate-chocolate chip ice cream.
Coffee, tea, or decaf? Iced tea
Milk chocolate or dark? Yes.
Buttered, plain, or salted popcorn? salted and
buttered if I had anything to say about it
Red or white wine? white
Gold or silver? Gold
Two or four doors? Two
Bridges or tunnels? Bridges
Beach, city, or country? Beach! Run around, play,
swim, eat, suntan, meet people, nap, toss the Frisbee for
Porthos...
Summer or winter? Summer
Storms: Cool or scary? Cool unless I'm flying in
one.
Roller coaster: Scary or exciting? mostly exciting,
although Trip wants to go on five times in a row. I can only
do it about twice.
James Dean or Clark Gable? Who?
Marilyn Monroe or Audrey Hepburn? Marilyn.
Beatles or Stones? Stones!
Blanket or stuffed animal? I have a little stuffed
beagle from the girlfriend whose mother gave me Porthos
One pillow or two? Three
Adidas, Nike, or Reebok? {bookmark for Hoshi}
Mac, PC, or Unix? Mac for sure. I think Travis writes
in Unix.
WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE...
Salad dressing? Ranch
Salad? Greek
Pizza topping? anchovies
Foods? Bacon cheeseburger. I'm not allowed to have
them any more; my cholesterol is too high, even with the medication.
:o(
Sandwich filling? BLT. Ditto.
Dessert? Anything with chocolate. Really. Dip a
brick in chocolate and I'll eat it. :o) Bricks don't have
any cholesterol, right?
Type of ice cream? Anything with chocolate in it.
Ben & Jerry's has some amazing flavors.
Restaurant? Stu's Kansas City BBQ
Fast food place? Stu's Kansas City BBQ
Drink, non-alcoholic? Iced tea
Drink, alcoholic? bourbon (if I can keep it away
from Trip), chocolate liqueur
Color of socks? white, unless it's Friday in which
case I wear bright green. I'm a rebel and I'll never be any
good.
Shampoo or conditioner? whatever's in Stores
Toothpaste? Don't care
Place to be kissed? I like having my earlobes nibbled...
Holiday? Memorial Day, for the clambakes
Color? Red
Car? F-26 vroooooom!
Day of the week? Thursday
Band/Artist? I find Gregorian chants soothing to
work to. Other than that, whatever's on.
Book? Anything by Del Stevens. Trying to get Trip
hooked.
Magazine? I haven't read a magazine in ages.
Movie? "To Kill a Mockingbird."
TV show? "Wagon Train"
TV character? Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I feel a
strong kinship with her, but I'm not sure why.
Disney character? Aladdin
Warner Bros. character? I always feel for Daffy.
Sesame Street character? Grover
James Bond? ooh, toughie. I love Brosnan (don't you
think he and Malcolm could be cousins? Especially with all
the gadgetry and cool weapons?), but I think it'll have to
be Connery by a nose.
Quote? Zephram Cochrane: "To boldly go where
no man has gone before."
Word or phrase? "We're on a mission of peaceful
exploration." I love saying that.
Flower? Sunflower
Sport to watch? WATER POLO!!!!! :o)
Zoo exhibit? dolphins. they're beautiful and friendly
and very smart.
Board game? Clue
Town to chill in? My kinda town, Chicago is my kinda
town...
Perfume/Cologne? On a starship with a closed circulation
system? Soap and water. Wash early and often.
Website? I'm the captain; I have no time to surf.
Unfortunately. If I did I'd be on the All-Terra Collegiate
Water Polo Association's site, though.
Least favorite thing? When my people are hurting,
if Porthos is miserable, bullies, being the guy who trailblazed
Enterprise right into a massacre (Remember the Paraagans!)
Least favorite subject? I liked them all.
RANDOM PERSONAL QUESTIONS
Been in love before? Once
Loved somebody so much it made you cry? No
Dumper or dumpee? Neither
What inspires you? We're making history with...
blah blah blah :o)
Where do you see yourself in 10 years? Still in
command of Enterprise. Maybe a Commodore. Another beagle.
Not like I'm ever going to find a SO out here.
What do you look for in a partner? Affection, desire
to explore, love of dogs, love of sports, someone who gets
my jokes, dependability, understanding of my job
What did you want to be when you grew up? The person
who got Dad's engines past the Vulcans! :P
What characteristics do you despise? Bigotry. Homophobia.
Racism. Cruelty.
If you had a big win in the lottery, how long would you
wait to contact people? Why wait?
Where would you retire to? The tropics. Chicago
is fun but much too windy.
Have you ever been convicted of a crime? No
Do you get along with your parents? When they were
alive, yes. I miss Dad a lot.
Have you ever gone skinny-dipping? Only once. Trip
better never tell anyone. But he was as, um, skinny as I was,
so there.
Do you make fun of people? I tease, but not mock.
That's mean.
Last person you went to dinner with? ummmmm I don't
remember. Oh, that surgically altered Tandaran woman, Keyla,
on Risa. Jeez, I need to get out more.
What did you do for your last birthday? The senior
staff threw me a surprise party. At 0200. I was VERY surprised.
:o) Actually I had a great time, once Malcolm turned off that
awful "Reed Alert" siren and my heart rate came
down out of the 300s.
Do you carry a donor card? Isn't that mandatory?
RANDOM QUESTIONS
Had the drink Calypso Breeze? I think that's what
Keyla made for me.
Been to Europe? yes
Been to Africa? yes -- you should see the gazelles...
Been toilet-papering? Maybe we should TP the warp
core for Trip's next birthday. heh heh.
Been toilet-papered? I let the neighbor's kids "mummify"
me in TP for Halloween a few years ago.
Been in a car crash? Several, but I've walked away
from them all. A few shuttle crashes too.
Lucky Number? 2?
Any superstitions? I like to spacewalk around the
ship once a month. Not that I don't trust Trip's staff, but
I feel better knowing I've inspected my own ship, my own self.
When was your last hospital visit? A few weeks ago,
after Malcolm rescued me from the Klingon prison planet. Jailbreaks
belong in movies. I thought we were out here to explore, not
get kidnapped twice a month...
First thing you think of when you wake up? Porthos,
get off whatever body part you're sleeping on!
What color is your bedroom's carpet? Starfleet industrial
gray. At home I had deep green.
What color is your bathroom? Starfleet white and
chrome
What's on your mouse pad? A photo of Porthos when
he was ten weeks old.
What's under your bed? My leather boots and leather
jacket. They don't really fit in my closet.
How many times did you fail your permit and/or driver's
license test? Twice. But I passed all my piloting tests
the first time.
If you could eat lunch with one famous person, who would
it be? Zephram Cochrane, so we could talk about Dad.
What was the last film you saw at the movies? Whatever
was showing at Movie Night... it was something with subtitles.
What was the last film you saw at home? "Ghost,"
"Shakespeare in Love," "To Kill a Mockingbird."
I was having a tissue-fest.
What was the last book you read? A biography of
Mark Felsworth, one of the best water polo players in the
last century.
What was the last CD you listened to? Travis is
trying to introduce us to music from places his parents have
been. I can't say I care for all of it, but it's really interesting.
What do you have for breakfast? Gengineered no-cholesterol
eggs, pancakes, orange juice.
Can you touch your nose with your tongue? No. But
that was a fun five minutes trying.
Can you roll your tongue? No. A less fun five seconds
trying.
How many keys on your key ring? three
Where would you like to visit most? The next star
system.
Hobbies? Water polo! Exploring.
Which single store would you choose to max your credit
card? I don't know... I'm not much of a shopper.
What do you do most often when you are bored? watch
water polo.
What words or phrases do you overuse? "Got
anything?" The comebacks I get...
What words or phrases do your friends overuse? "I'll
get back to ya." (Trip, deal with it now!)
Friend who lives farthest away? Sasha in Moscow.
Greatest pet peeve? Aliens who take potshots at
my ship and my crew. Vulcans getting in the way of progress.
Best thing in the world? Exploring, seeing what
nobody else has seen, making history, a great water polo game,
Frisbee catch with Porthos and Trip on Venice Beach
When do you get up? 0530 hours
Bedtime? oh-dark-hundred
Last new thing you bought for yourself? A big thick
soft fuzzy blanket for my couch. When T'Pol comes by to give
reports she's always cold, so she can curl up in that and
not freeze while we debrief.
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