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Memo to TPTB: Let Archer be Archer

My first off-topic rant: why is Archer such a wimp?

Photogenic, Schizophrenic You: Captain Archer, Season Two

Since people were asking for it, I went back to see if Archer's gotten any better in the intervening year.

Food Chain

It's amazing how these people can still fit into those very closely tailored uniforms, given that they're eating and drinking practically every single episode.

Welcome to the BowMouth (all one document)

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

"Enterprise" à la "Buffy the Vampire Slayer," plus every other pop reference and inside joke I could possibly jam in. All the Klingon is canon, even if the grammar is off. It's very long, but all text -- no photos. (I did break it up into quarters if that makes it easier to read.)

The ENT Drinking Game

From one drink to chug. Suggestions welcome and will be credited.

Personal Quizzes

Trip Malcolm Archer T'Pol Phlox Travis Hoshi Porthos Cutler Rostov Soval

The ultimate edition of the famous "tell me all about yourself" email survey, answered by our intrepid crew. Set between "Horizon" and "The Breach," so before the Borg, the Cogenitor, and the Xindi. Co-writing credit goes to rainwoman, with a little help from the always-generous Archer4Trip.

Personal Quizzes,
Mirror Universe

Tucker Reed Archer T'Pol Phlox Mayweather Sato Forrest Soval Rostov

A slightly different version of the Personal Quiz, tailored to the Mirror Universe. Set during various points in "In a Mirror, Darkly 1 and 2" depending on the character. Co-writing credit goes to myst and rainwoman.

Plastic Fantastic Theatre Presents:
Day of the Tripods

Okay, so I got my Trip-in-Starfleet-blues action figure, and I was going to take another credenza photo, and Moogie said, "That's cheesy! Let's go in the garage where we can set up the lights properly." This is the result after a six-hour photo shoot and another six hours of SFX. Photo-intensive.

Get Me Rewrite!

(Don't forget to check Off-Topic for non-ENT photos.)

I provide the photo; you provide the dialogue, caption, or other silliness. Feel free to email captions for past photos.
This is a PG-13 site, and as such, overly lewd, crude, or otherwise obscene material will not be posted.

Goats RobeGoopArcherCaveBetsiesCheese chatTrip TECHShranTied upCanisterMalcolm scanningConversationWidgetGratPhlox EV SuitsSulibanArcher in furHelmet heads Reed walkDesert visionConferenceSickbayMirror Bridge ClemBluesies

Every Picture Tells a Story

I provide the photos from past Get Me Rewrites; you provide the running jokes.

Archer, Get Your Goats by xeyes • In the Air Tonight by xeyes • Ev'ry Guy's Crazy 'Bout a Sharp-Dressed Officer by xeyes

Those SHIRTS! Photos of Trip actor Connor Trinneer (and a few of Trip) in high-decibel haberdashery.
ENT Libs Remember the classic kids' game Mad Libs? Here's ENT Libs, the "Enterprise" version. Slowly expanding to cover the episodes as well as characters.

DVD Audio Commentaries

The Catwalk
Dead Stop
Future Tense

An alternate version of the audio commentary track on the ENT DVDs. In the order they were posted, which has nothing to do with the order in which they aired.
Inspired by "Audio commentary 5 for The Two Towers" by rohandove.
TripSuckered April Fool! (the 2004 edition)
Last Wills and Testaments from the NX-01 Look, it's dangerous out there.
Choose Your Own ENTventure! One story. Eighteen different endings. No deaths, I promise.
Season 4: Go Big, Go Bold, Go For Broke My wish list for Season 4, or at least how I would have done things if I were king.
'Twas the ENT Before Christmas And all through the ship, not a creature was stirring, not even a <snip>
By wombat61 and rainwoman.
New Year's Resolutions of the NX-01 Crew (and friends) And none of that tired old "Lose weight, spend less, clean out the garage" stuff either.
Bumperstickers from the NX-01 Crew (and friends) That is, if they all drove cars. Co-writing credit goes to Tripper. Suggestions welcome and will be credited. I also did a list of R-rated bumperstickers, but you'll have to email me for that.
the symmetry principle For April Fool's 2005, I thought I'd do something a little different: a gushy, giggly, swooning fansite... for quantum physicist Stephen Hawking. It's all in fun; no disrespect is intended.
Dear Shrannie The advice column by everyone's favorite Andorian agony aunt, Shrann Landers.
April 8, 2005
June 10, 2005
September 5, 2005
Back to School with the NX-01 Crew (and friends) A few years after Starfleet Academy's opening in 2161. A sampling of what courses our intrepid crew might take, or teach. Co-writing credit goes to myst and Tripper.
What They Say Off-Camera "Lines You'll Never Hear On ENT," through the fourth wall. Suggestions welcome and will be credited.
What's on the iPods of the NX-01 crew? (and friends) I bet they have like forty-seven-bazillion-GB drives and the iPods play holoprograms.
Things Archer Signs Without Looking Just your ordinary run-of-the-mill memos from the NX-01 crew and friends.
TuckerWrenched Imagine if the whole show had been set in the Mirror Universe. April Fool!
All I Really Need to Know I Learned From Trip Tucker And what better example could we have? Suggested by Hildwyn of Rohan.
ENT Motivational Posters Unless you're the lead sehlat, the view never changes. Submissions welcome and will be credited.